Entering a different world - January 9, 2009

I know you all have been wondering how I am doing. It's taken me all this time to feel like myself. I was feeling "right" by Tuesday evening and sat down to write something twice, but the words wouldn't come out. Finally, last night, after having been awakened by nature's call, my mind was able to formulate a decent post. Just an aside before I get right into it - has anyone heard of the reduction of bladder size as a common side effect of chemo? I never need to get up to "go" but now, I am getting up once or twice a night. What a pain! OK, here's what you've all been waiting to hear.

Friday went all right. I was there for 2 ¾ hours and had a good time, if that’s possible. My friend Wanda came with me and sat through everything. She took lots of pictures and played cribbage with me. She had even arranged for her husband to bring in the “chemo basket” she had put together the day before. It came equipped with all the possible combatants to any side effects I might have while on chemo – it included a funny hat, sunglasses, Imodium, sunscreen, bottled water, and a funny movie. When I finally rolled out of the hospital at 1:45, I didn’t feel too bad, just a bit tired. Once I got home, though I began to feel a bit nauseous, even though I was given a huge dose of anti-nausea medication. I ate a bit of the lovely dinner Norm made for us – cod topped with a tomato dressing, rice and cole slaw. Next on the agenda was puppy obedience class. I figured I would just sit at the back of the class while someone else handled the dog. Hah – I didn’t even get out of the van. About half and hour into my wait, I started to feel really bad and got sick. Can you imagine - behind the van at Pet-Smart? Oh brother. The other family who is taking the class all came out at the end of class to see how I was doing and gave me big hugs – that was wonderful. I got home, and was sick again, and this is in spite of taking two different anti-nausea meds. All Friday night, I slept and felt really sick.

Saturday and Sunday was exactly the same. I got up for a bit to check out the action, ate a half slice of toast, took for meds, then went back to bed. I was able to eat a little lunch, but dinner was another story. Maybe it's the cooking smells, I don't know, but the evenings were my worst time. It's like morning sickness but a bazillion times worse. I had a headache for Friday and Saturday, but the tiredness and nausea were the two main struggles.

The kids came to check on me periodically while I lay in bed, but that's about all the excitement I could handle. I didn't feel like watching TV or reading, not even my beloved Diana Gabaldon. The book was so heavy and my eyes weren't working right. Dull, dull, dull. I moved from bed to couch then back again, and slept the weekend away.

Norm was off on Monday and continued to take care of me. He was really great the whole time. He made great meals that I felt bad not eating, and drove the kids to all their activities. By the time the kids came home from school Monday, I felt ready for a bit of action. Norm needed to get some shopping done, so I went along for the ride - ooh, my first trip out. I thought I would just sit in the car, but actually made it inside the Costco. Amazing! I held on to the cart and was careful not to break any speed records. We met a friend at the door on the way out and I got another hug. Did I mention that I have become a converted hugger? She said I looked good - you did say that didn't you Tia? I'm sure you did. Anyway, that boosted my spirits tremendously.

Tuesday, I was on my own. Norm went to work, and the kids went to school. I ate small meals and puttered around the house. I was getting very bored by this point. Luckily, Tuesday was Girl Guide night. I warmed up the chili Claire and Roger had brought over and dinner was done! Yummy. If anyone else living close by wants to bring us dinner, we are not fussy. Spicy, exotic, plain or homestyle, we will eat anything; we're not fussy! I took Rosalie and Evelynne to Girl Guides, spoke with other adults, and felt like - myself - yeah!

Wednesday, I was ready for serious action. I called up Wanda and we went shopping. I spent money on me, and it felt great. I think I'm going to make a habit of that. I now have new shoes, two pairs of jeans, a shirt, some fancy soap, and a flashy shade of lipstick. I made dinner for the family - a delicious black bean chicken with garlic and ginger (look in my recipe section for an easy how-to). Norm and I had a nice talk with Lucas (honey, think "skateboard"), and the day was over. Now I have just over two weeks of felling good. I'll take it. Thank you God for getting me through the first cycle.

See below for pics of day one.

Still on the outside. I do not look too impressed!

Margie, starting the IV

Injecting the Epirubicin

Wanda and I, getting informed

My beautiful "chemo basket"

Thanks to everyone for your support and for your kind comments. I love reading the comments on my blog. To post a comment, click on the post title, then scoll down to the bottom where you have the option to leave a comment. They will be something I always look back on.